Every once in a while the ridiculous, unforgiving, moronic attempts at legalizing discrimination and hate get to me. But for some reason, this last deal in New Jersey just felt like, “Eh, 20 dummies to 14 reasonable humans. At least the gap is narrowing.”

And really, at this point, the resistance against giving us queers an equal shot at life through the eyes of the law is like a bunch of beefy dudes standing on the side of a mountain, all sorts of pumped up and ready to try and stop an avalanche. Go for it I say, but don’t look too surprised when an unexpected sudden rush of equality snowballs your self righteous ass. Because as dumb and as mean as too many people are, history shows over and over again, that regardless of the resistance, at some point a collective conscious gets its shit together just enough and real progress towards not being so dumb and mean wins out… eventually. Yes, most of the time it is two steps forward and one to three steps back (hi, California, you are still the king of SuckItVille), but there is progress regardless.

So, yes, there are still a bunch of homo-hating-meanies out there, and poo on all of them. No, seriously, may a very large gastrointestinally-challenged bird poop on each and every one of your bigoted heads on your very best hair day right before some very important event. But like my godmother, Ruth, would advise, I need to hold tighter to the positive, which is that there are also a ton of wonderful, smart, kind, caring, informed, reasonable folks out there, and I know this for a fact. Four of my favorites being, you know, Dorothy, Blanche, Rose and Sophia. And really, thank gawd for the Golden Girls of the world! And to all of you who get it, thank you very much for not sucking and may bird poop never touch your fabulous, equality-loving heads.

(This clip is only a minute and 21 seconds, even you attention span deprived folks can handle that. Just watch it!)